


The Night They Tore Ole Atlas Down

by Tank_the_Unstoppable



Category: RWBY
Genre: Comedy, Drunkenness, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:46:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22288858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tank_the_Unstoppable/pseuds/Tank_the_Unstoppable
Summary: Blame this mess on Facebook and RWBY groups! After all the hell everyone's been through a night in a dive bar cant be a bad idea.....right?
Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long, Lie Ren/Nora Valkyrie, Ruby Rose/Weiss Schnee
Comments: 6
Kudos: 10





	The Night They Tore Ole Atlas Down

It was blistering cold. The kind of cold that sinks into your bones and stays there. After all the insanity the past few days had brought them, The Grimm, the dinner, and of course...the evacuation of Mantel, it was finally time for everyone to simply stop and catch their breath.

Oh yes, there was still so much left to do, but no one would be of any use without a very well earned rest. It was under that guise that General Ironwood recommended a night out followed by several uninterrupted hours of sleep. A night out to help everyone wined down. A night out to smile, and laugh, and even drink a bit if so needed. Under this guise Team RWBY, Jaune, Nora and Ren decided to hit a simple bar for good times a plenty. Winter even decided to come along. Just in case of trouble. Sure. Our lovely little band of misfit hunters walk up to a rather hidden building. A burned out rather old sign hung above a large door. In mismatched letters it reads The Point.

Compared to the shiny, almost pristine buildings surrounding it, this place looks... "Wreched!...er...we aren't really going in there...are we?" questioned Wiess. " Damn right we are!" exclaimed Yang as she pulled open the rusty metal door. Good ole classic rock blasts loudly as everyone steps through the doorway. Its dank, it reeks of cheap beer and cigarette smoke. It's..."This is awesome!" yells Yang over the thumping music. "Let's head to the bar! I am so ready to down some shots and rock the night away!" Grabbing Blake's hand, our favorite lesbian duo head to the far left past a few mismatched tables to the large graffiti covered bar. "Ruby...you aren't actually going to drink in this....place?" Wiess questioned with a concerned and slightly disgusted look. "Sister, I am surprised at you! We both know looks can be deceiving." Winter encouraged as the rest of the crew slowly worked there way further into The Point.

The place is pretty full tonight. Lots of Mantel refuges looking for...well...anything to help them feel better even if it's just for a moment. Off in the darkest corner, two shadowed figures watch our brave little group of hellions with great interest. "Those little shits are crazier than I thought" says figure number one. Her eyes shining...wait...oh shit they are glowing, and the smile oh that's a smile that would make milk sour. Her friend sits quietly, eying poor Ruby like she was the most vile thing on Remanant. Perhaps to her, she is. Ah, yes kids rejoice it's our favorite on again/off again baddies. Neo scowls as she watches Ruby chatting, smiling with Wiess and Winter. " Yes, Neo I believe you are right. It's time we show these bastards what a night on the town is really like...but where to start." Cinder ponders, her human hand tapping lightly at her chin as she plots a diabolical plan to disturb the positive vibe of all in her vicinity. Neo points at Ruby, glaring and draws her thumb across her own throat. Her intentions plainly clear. She wants to buy Ruby a scarf...no no wait...oh..oh dear! Apparently, she wants Ruby dead. "Now Neo, dear what's the fun in that..we could kill her...kill them all in fact..but let's make it a bit more interesting than just the run of the mill sort of death" Cinder rises, with Neo at her side. Cloaked and mysterious as fuck.

She strolls casually up to our blond bombshell, Yang, who is obviously trying to flirt with Blake. Man, these two are hopeless! I mean a blind man could see they are purfect together... oh geez did I just make a cat pun...maybe tonight they figure this out. Cinder places a hand on Yang's shoulder and slids around to her side, commanding both our girls attention. Especially Blakey's cause dis bitch touching her sunshine. With a smirk, Cinder leans down and says..."Rumor has it Yang Xiao Long can't hold her drink!" With a smile and the glint of trouble in her eye, Yang responds with "Rumor has it..." at that moment the Blake that was across the table dissapeared. A clone! Blake had ninja-ed her way behind the cloaked figures and with a wisk of her hand revealed them to all in the bar. Yang stands, armed and ready, "Rumor has it...CINDER IS TALKING SHIT!" With Ember Celica locked, loaded and aimed right for Cinder, the two baddies lock eyes smiling. Neo reaches for the shot sitting in front of Yang. She downs it with a grin. "You sawed off little bitch! That was mine!"

That's all it took! At this point everyone has been drinking. Now, all hell was breaking loose. Jaune somehow managed to smash into the jukebox and the classic song Ballroom Blitz is now blaring through the speakers. Nora busted a table and is now chasing Cinder with Ruby and Wiess trying to corner her. Neo has grabbed a pool cue and is playing defense as Ren and Blake throw pool balls at her like dual ninja cannons. Yang is punching everyone and anyone that gets within a foot of her. Wiess and Ruby are closing in on Cinder. Its utter pandemonium!!!! Bottles are flying! People are dodging left and right! Nora is laughing like the adorable psycho that she is tossing a full keg of Miller High Life through the wall!

The door slams open and a intimidating figure storms in. "THAT IS ENOUGH!" booms a powerful voice from the top of the bar. Standing under the now shaking and cracked bar light is BIG DADDY Ironwood. Everyone freezes and turns to face the bar, stunned. It is so quiet you could hear...the clickety clack of heels. At the other end of the bar, rising up on to its liquor coated surface stands a disheveled but still regal as fuck, Winter Schnee. In her hands she has two bottles of Bacardi 151. With a laugh, she screams "MY DAD WEARS A CLIP ON TIE!!!!!" and pours Bacardi! One bottle flows past her pale lips and the other pours down to a shocked and now booze soaked Wiess.

In a twist that would make M. Night Shyamalan gush...a deep voice answers from the other end of that poor barely-holding up bar. Grasping his throat, Ironwood booms "NO I DON'T!" With this admission, and the tension decimated, the insanity from before descends on Team RWBY, Jaune who finally came out from under the pool table, Nora who retrieved the keg and proceeded to down it with a loud belch, Blake on top of the pool table poised and ready to strike at any and all targets, Yang at her back with her sights lined up on Neo who is sitting on the jukebox, sipping a glass of gin...Wiess who is "conversing" rather loudly with Winter on her "extracurricular activities"...Ruby is straight up mean girl brawling with Cinder..(and a partrage in a pear tree....no...wrong time of year for that shit!)

Several hours later....  
The Point is in shambles. Everyone and I do mean everyone is boozed, bruised, and somehow Wiess got tattooed? After all the chaos, Cinder and Neo are crying. Something about not enough love from their mothers? Yang and Blake may or may not be legally married...does a maiden have that power? Winter and Ironwood...are...well they kind of just disappeared into the bathroom and after hearing "YES DADDY YESSS!" multiple times...it just made everyone drink more. Nora and Ren have invented a new team combo where they get Jaune drunk as possible and just point him towards a baddie and let him spew like a vomit bazooka. They dubbed this move the BoozenBlast.

Ruby is passed out under the pool table with Wiess wrapped in her cape. Gotta admit, Wiess looks good in red. As the new day dawns everyone gathers outside the rusted door, somehow that damn thing is still holding on. "So about that uninterrupted rest..." Ren asked holding a bar towel over his busted eye. "Rest! Who needs rest?" laughs Nora. Everyone raises a hand. Actually, Blake raises Yang's robotic arm as it was recently freed from the jukebox.

As our favorite rag-tag group of miscreants walk down the street, we see good ole Uncle Qrow walking towards them with Clover and the rest of Ace Ops. "JIMMY! What the hell...what happened to you all last night!?" "Qrow you wouldn't believe me if I told you" is all Ironwood could say as he looked at the state of everyone around him. Shaking his head Qrow responds, "Someone questioned Firecracker's drinking abilities again didn't they?" With a hearty laugh, Ironwood calls for transportation. For years, the crew would try to piece together the events that took place that night. No one ever figured out how Wiess got a tattoo of a white rose on her left thigh!  
THE END!


End file.
